Sunday, May 9, 2010

Thieves Jargon 199



I'm pretty sure I sent the singer in the band above a copy of "Kittens in the Boiler" when it came out. You can plainly see the influence in the scene.

Welcome to Thieves Jargon 199. Scannell brought together some interesting fiction that I really enjoyed. Stove Hands starts with a guy burning his hands on a stove and gets weirder from there. Danny Sadsack and Razor Wire give the the gift of the city. Matt Salesses has Epidemics stories popping up like funky rashes, and I like seeing one in TJ.

As for the poetry, a lot of sex, only nobody's having any fun. Miller Daniels dick poems always make me laugh, I kind of wish I knew about somebody paying homage to the female anatomy these days quite like Carl dedicates to the men.


In other news:
Joel Van Noord acts like a woman.

Mark Baumer is walking across the country.

Cats are pretending Natasha Henstridge's death had an important impact on their lives.

Headz the Novel by John Colagrande has sparked a bidding frenzy.

41 comments:

Detector said...

Thanks for the mention of my cat blog.

Anonymous said...

Does that guy Daniels ever write poems about guys with little dicks?

mather said...

The only things Baumer forgot to put in that pack were fingernail polish and tampons.

Anonymous said...

good job mather.

Detector said...

I took the Activia 14 day challenge and finally pooped.

Anonymous said...

did a lot come out?

Detector said...

The Smallville finale was pretty lame. If he doesn't become Superman next season he never will.

frank murtha said...

is that head in the cover art steven spielberg?

detector, you are real odd. I always assume you're joking about stuff. but then you take everything so seriously that i think you're really into it. like katie perry, cats? being racist and homophobic but then getting real offended when people say "retarded". carry on, however.

Detector said...

It's Katy Perry. Her new song is awesome by the way.

Anonymous said...

katy perry sucks.

master p said...

i kissed a girl and i liked it.

i want your loving and i want your disease.

like a virgin.

like a complete unknown

bye bye miss american pie

i'm a joker, i'm a smoker

all and all you're just another brick in the wall.

you ain't nothing but a houndog.

i get by with a little help from my friends.

Detector said...

"Stuff Cats Like" is holding a contest for the best short story about Theodore Puertoriquez In The Andes. The story must feature Theodore Puertoriquez as the protagonist and must take place in the Andes. From 2,000-3,500 words. Stories must be sent in body of the email with contact info at the bottom.

(It is suggested you read about the character of Theodore Puertoriquez on Stuff Cats Like to help with your story.)

No attachments will be read.

Winning entry will be posted on Stuff Cats Like and recieve 100$. Must have paypal account to recieve prize money.

Email entries.

www.stuffcatslikes.blogspot.com

cragrati said...

feel like i just got something like this in my spam folder.

mather said...

I am bosu enfriti with grand award only 4 U immediate reply pleeze...

mather said...

details here: http://trickwithaknife.com/?p=663

Detector said...

Mather Fingers Mother

News At Eleven

mather said...

Mother Hubbard?

mather said...

Good biscuits and gravy...corner of Grant and Stone...Tucson...you guys are a bunch of weenies...any Ryan Call fans here?

Andy Henion said...

Great art with this issue. I looked at her website: Wonderful stuff.

Spencer Troxell said...

"I kind of wish I knew about somebody paying homage to the female anatomy these days quite like Carl dedicates to the men."

What about Kitty Kelly? Isn't that why her recent Oprah biography was so controversial?

Detector said...

Does her book mention Oprah's vagina? I don't get your comment.

I know South Park did a whole episode about Oprah's vagina and butt.

Mather introduced me to Joseph Goosey's dick. Now I don't care about the female anatomy anymore.

Anonymous said...

the fact that you don't get the comment sort of explains a lot. also, who is another good singer besides katy perry?

Spencer Troxell said...

There's no lonelier feeling than having your sense of humor misunderstood.

Detector said...

Besides Katy Perry I would say my other favorie singers are Jenny Lewis,Lady GaGa, and Zooey Deschanel.

renaissance jones said...

this joint is lame without me..!

Detector said...

Regina Spektor.

Spencer Troxell said...

Matt: Thanks for putting the Future of the Left video up. I've never heard them before. They're fun.

Major Bummer said...

Miller's dick poems are... so... OLD.

Also, the Island of Epidemics piece is an interesting idea that goes absolutely nowhere... multiple times. Why not just set sail for a whole new archipelago? Damn.

Anonymous said...

i imagine they're saving up their siiiick pieces for the grand 200th.

mather said...

This place is dead in the water. I for one am not grieving.

Anonymous said...

i miss the TJ of ol'

Anonymous said...

Mather, you killed Thieves Jargon.

Anonymous said...

mather wishes. his impact was nil.

Anonymous said...

yeah. nil. Thieves Jargon killed itself.

mather said...

It wasn't me! I was hoping Thieves Jargon lived long enough to publish one of my poems!

Anonymous said...

Thieves Jargon killed Mather.

Anonymous said...

thieves jargon killed mather.

mather said...

Is this Heaven?

Anonymous said...

Mather and Thieves Jargon killed each other in a sexy punk rock suicide pact.

Anonymous said...

more like mather was a nasty intestinal parasite that tj got by sitting on a tractor in some iowa cornfield looking for justin hyde's poetry.

mather said...

It's hard to say until the final studies are done.